I have grown up loving and living in a make believe world of fairy tales. The die hard romantic in me loved stories of Prince Charming comes riding his white horse, sweeping the princess off her feet, or the knight in shining amour saving the damsel in distress or the Bollywood Yash Chopra version of “The Raj Malhotra” can woo every one with his charm, fix every situation and have his Simran running back into his arms. And yet I have failed at every possible attempt at even sustaining a potential prince charming leave alone living happily ever after. I kept wondering all these years, where did I go wrong? I’ve lived feeling a victim of my own self defeating ‘poor me’ victim stories. For every failed attempt, I beat myself up believing probably I wasn’t lucky in love and someday the real prince charming would finally arrive. I guess if only I had realized what I have in the last 3 months of another failed attempt, I probably would have begun my journey of creating a realistic happily ever after long ago.
I realized he ( every potential prince charming) was as human as I am, and he too had his own demons to fight. Probably had no one to rescue him either. At times he was helpless, at times he lacked strength & courage to fight his own life’s battles alone, at times he doesn’t think he is worthy enough, at times he is too trapped in his past and at times he has grown up being told it’s not ok to be vulnerable and share his truest feelings,fears and take support. How I wish he truthfully and courageously asked for help and allowed himself to be rescued from his demons by someone truly loved him in spite of having sensed his demons long before he fled.
Then again, maybe I too was busy fighting my own demons/fears and hoped to be rescued, perhaps that’s why I was always told you need someone who can take care of you, accepts you for who you are, give all his love and attention BLAH BLAH BLAH … and that’s what i waited for till i learnt to fight for myself …no one ever told me my potential Prince Charming was as human as I was too. Probably he too needed what I did, to be taken care of, accepted for who he was,loved unconditionally and at times be rescued. Life would be far more simpler and realistic for both, don’t you think ?
All I can hope is, now that I have outgrown most unrealistic parts of fairy tales, i guess i have finally surrendered to the process of growing up gracefully, may I magically meet ‘ The One’ who i can love and accept in totality with all his human tales and demon, and both of us allow each of us to be rescued, living (together) a happily ever after…