Our journey, as I understand. is not to become anything or go anywhere or achieve anything. It’s simply about us “un-becoming” & going within to our true self. As a sensitive soul most of us were born with this understanding, our initial formative years are beautiful, vulnerable, tender, free & very authentic. We simply live life fully feeling so alive being who we were meant to be. As our awareness grows, we begin to look around and realise we are different,open, innocent & even naive. Rather than embracing the uniqueness we fall a trap of the conditioning of our care givers and society who are not conscious to our way of being & purpose. It’s not their fault. They are unaware, asleep & following the rut of life as they were taught. They aren’t aware of sensitive beings & how it’s a precious gift.
Constant conditioning, criticism, being taught the rules of life, harsh circumstances begin to shut down the sensitive soul. We are wronged for being us as we don’t fit in or belong. Everything needs nurturing & nourishment to grow healthily. Lack of it gets the sensitive soul to shrink it’s vastness. It tries hard to fit in, to hide, to build fortresses to protect ones tender being in a non accepting toughen fast paced world. Often one is told “ Toughen up “ if you wish to survive. But it wasn’t ever meant to simply survive … it was created to thrive, live fully & lead. Unfortunately it succumbs to the insanity of humanity. Learns to hide become shadows of the so called tough ones that claim to know how to navigate this world. The sensitive soul is constantly made to feel wrong for being itself and it begins to believe it too. Yet something within keeps nudging it through its journey pleading it to come into its power. Unfortunately most sensitive souls die a spiritual or physical death believing they were sent to the wrong planet at the wrong time and they simply didn’t belong. They adapt to the smallness or hide behind the self created thick walled fortresses. Then there are those like me … who hear the whispers from within, enjoy the glimpses of the sensitivity & vastness and shrink back time & again . The whisper get louder with each passing year and it begins to scream & haunt in a daunting manner that it’s not something that can be ignored anymore . It pleads to break free.
The un- becoming begins, there are days it feels very painful & tiring. It forces you to break out of our safe cocoon. Deep layers& layers of conditioning,wrongness & judgements need to be pealed, deep wounds need to be addressed & healed, hardened stone walls of the fortress need to be shattered, one needs to learn to parent and nourish oneself .Makes you feel lost, not knowing where you are headed. Makes you grieve the loss of who you were told you were, pain of believing the conditioning you imbibed all along, the anger of how you allowed to shrink yourself to fit in and frustration of yet being in slow transition mode, gathering strength & allowance for un-becoming, & coming into one’s true authentic self one witnessed as a child.
Yes, It’s scary and yet essential for the sensitive soul’s evolution, soul contract & for it to come into its true power. More one fights it the tougher it gets.The only way out is to surrender & allow.
Then again it is the journey all we souls took this birth for.Everything else is mere illusion & distraction of the mind. The work needs to be done … however this may not be the journey every soul chooses in this lifetime …
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